You know how awkward your first time can be. You don't know exactly where to put your hands. Not sure exactly what to say. You're all sweaty and excited. The adrenalin is pumping. And that's just the first date, let alone the first fuck.

When a date goes afoul, women are more likely to attribute it to you than the situation. Therefore, the more you can create a relaxed environment and smooth experience for the first date, the more likely you will be to impress the girl. Since the odds are not in your favor, a little planning is necessary. Here are eight tips to reduce first-date stress:

1. Plan Ahead: If you ask her to dinner and want to suggest drinks afterward, know where the nearby bars are, how to get there and where to park.
2. Know the Environment: Dress well and make sure your date knows how to dress too. Women feel uncomfortable when they don't feel appropriately dressed for a situation. If she's under-dressed, cold or walking twenty blocks in hooker heels, connecting with you won't be top of mind.
3. Let It Out: Pent-up sexual tension is your enemy on the first date. Women can sense your physical cravings and generally don't respond well. Prepare yourself for the date Ben Stiller style. Hey, he did end up scoring the girl.
4. Don't be Nervous: It's not sexy. Not sexy = not getting sex. Ya dig? I realize it's easier said than done, but perhaps referring to item #3 will help.
5. Don't Do Guy Things: You can drag her to all the sporting events, poker tournaments and cigar bars once you have her in the bag. But, to start, pick something she likes, a neutral option, or best of all a common interest activity.
6. Don't Spend Too Much: We like being pampered, true. But many women will feel either guilty or physically obligated to reciprocate by a guy that doles out the dough on the first few dates. If we feel guilty, it's because we probably aren't that into you. And you don't want us to feel physically obligated -- just physically inclined.
7. Conversation is King: Perhaps conversation isn't your best oral skill. That's OK by me. But, good conversation is key to having a fun date and getting to know the girl. All you have to do is ask her questions to get the ball rolling. Like, where are you from? What kind of work do you do? What type of music do you like? If that doesn't work. . .
8. Have an Exit Strategy: You know it's not going well. She knows it's not going well. But you are both stuck shucking clams in the third course of a ten-course meal. Worse yet, the conversation is drier than the overpriced merlot. Shit. Dates shouldn't be torture for either party. Plan a short activity for the first date or have in mind a nice way to end a disastrous date before you even get started.